Today I hoped to catch some inspiration from two specific sources: The Best Quotations For All Occasions (1), and As A Man Thinketh (2). I planted myself on my front porch, early, and was overjoyed it was going to be only me, the bees, and an occasional car. The bushes along the railing are humming, but it’s OK; the bees stay put.
Ah, serenity. Ah, calm. Then….
“…different road things represent…”
Voices! I wasn’t alone. Dang! I looked up and saw they were back, a herd of bikers, en masse. Apparently, we live on a very appealing route to bikers. Bicycle riders, that is. Hmmm. Should I stay put or go inside?
“…where the ‘F’ is your….?”
Yep. I’m staying right here. We’ll just have a listen, keep an open ear. Maybe I’ll learn something.
Back to Susan. Sarandon, that is. I’ve been chewing on something she said. It reads: “I look forward to being older, when what you look like becomes less an issue and what you are is the point.” Of course we all want that to be the case. I agree with her, but…
I saw my doctor this week. Along with the other annual unpleasantries, there was something new. “You are a little bit over weight.”
“…that’s not really anybody’s fault…”
Right?!!? That’s what I’m thinking. This is the first time a doctor has told me this. How come two years ago, at my same weight, a different doctor told me my weight was just fine? I even questioned her; I know little a bulge–OK, two–when I see one/them. It has to be perspective: the doctor two years ago was on the chubby side. My new doctor is on the slim side. So, who is right? The biker, of course!
Then there’s the hair. Two and a half years ago I decided to stop coloring. At first it was a “demi color,” whatever that means. It didn’t hide the gray, it just minimized the shock. You know, the pair of gray horns that seem to stick straight forward at eye level? Uh, huh. After three or four months of demi, I went cold turkey.
“…I’m not sure we were on this street last year…”
No kidding! Check out this comparison:
This is a brand new boulevard. I’m trying to fully embrace Susan’s words, though. Yeah, the part about who you are versus what you look like. It’s just happening so quickly.
Well, that’s just it. I’m just OK. I’m not great, but thanks. To make matters worse, while the bathroom mirror at work is complimentary–I am clearly 15 pounds slimmer at work–the lighting is on steroids. To be fair, it is a dental clinic, and it is most advantageous to actually see our patients’ teeth. On the other hand, under this scrutiny, neither Clairol nor Cover Girl can do their best. I don’t want to start on aging skin.
“…see you later, guys…”
Ain’t that the truth. Goodbye brunette tresses, hello silver streaks.
If I’m honest, I have to say I am learning to appreciate ( i.e. the residents at mom’s Independent Living home think I live there, too) my graying mane. My hair feels healthier than it has in too many years to count. It isn’t as flat as it was. It’s more full, and it’s very soft. I will go so far as to say that without chemicals it has…lift. I could use lift.
“…if only all the roads were this nice…”
Exactly! I don’t have to do anything, yet each day I sprout increasingly larger numbers of gray hair. This has been a relatively easy transition as far as aging goes, aside from that little weight problem.
“…would you consider going back to college?”
Well, I just did, and while I appreciate the thought, I don’t think that would help. I know how to reduce caloric intake, and I do know how to exercise.
“…ugh…it’s a workout….”
I know, no pain, no gain. I get it. It’s not that I’m unwilling. We garden, we hike, we walk, and I started planks. We love our fruits and veggies, especially those we grow.
It’s more a matter of what she said. Susan. I am learning to accept this thing called aging. I don’t necessarily like it, but I am trying to go with it. It’s not like I have a boatload of choices. It’s not like I won’t really age, like I can stop it. We learn to manage it, like we manage our profile settings.
Ultimately, it’s about being content with oneself (dark and slim or gray and chubby? I’d be happy with slim and gray. I think).
“…and it IS weird…”
Yes, I definitely agree Susan is on to something, but maybe I need to get on a bike.
(1) Henry, L. The Best Quotations For All Occasions.
(2) Allen, J. As A Man Thinketh.