Have you ever had one of those days? It’s a day like many others when you open your social media page and, when seeing a meme you like or a favorite topic, like everyone else on the planet, you decide to chime in. You jump in happily and post a comment. Soon, the backlash starts, you see a string of negative comments. You realize it’s you, that it was your comment, that it went completely sideways. The responses don’t align with the topic you intended to discuss, or the idea you intended to convey. Was it my grammar?
Or, how about this: you’ve been delivered a blow. A major life event has occurred, maybe an illness or death, maybe someone left you, maybe you’ve been fired. In your devastated state you cannot bear to see the people associated with the incident. You can’t bear to see their friends. You can’t bear it because your pain is raw. They got a raise, they are in love, they’ve booked a trip to France…but you are bleeding. So in that moment you decide to delete rather than unfollow, or hide, or whatever the current term is to not see certain people. It’s the only way you can survive.
People soon realize you are gone. Soon because, as we all know, there are those* who closely follow the numbers. Oh, yes. Their
fragile ego self-worth is tied to those numbers. If they went to bed last night with a comfortable 487 friends but woke up with 486, you can damn betcha they are going to find out who in hell had the nerve if it’s the last thing they do that day. Matter of fact, it will probably be the first thing they do, like call in sick so they can hunt you down.
You’ve DUMPED them, and the only possible explanation is that you are a bitch. Adjust your crown, honey, and get used to it. You are now The F-A-C-E-B-I-T-C-H.
*To be fair, there are those who got stung, those who genuinely cared and were hurt that I deleted them from my list (at a particular low point, I deleted 50 people). It’s happened to me. I’ve added people who accepted my request but later deleted me, and some who never accepted. These are not people I only know by name; I refer to people I grew up with, people I’ve known for years. One woman–someone I grew up with–said to me in a restaurant a few years back, “Find me on Facebook!” I did, she accepted, and then she dumped me. Again.
I’ve learned that people behave because of what is going on with them, not you; their behavior is not about me.
Which brings me to the crux of this post: I was hurting. In the process, I behaved in a way that hurt others. It’s a really good idea to stay away from assumptions. We all know it, but is this how we think? Is this our first thought? Do we give others the benefit of the doubt, or do we assume the worst? It’s time to not take this personally. Really. It ain’t about you (or me). I let people go because I was in a world of hurt. I have to offer others the same benefit.
One last thought about social media, grammar, and assumptions. May we all take a lesson.
In hopes we all live with a more forgiving heart, have a wonderful weekend!
*I hereby officially coin the term Facebitch. It’s mine. 😉